In this series, we are going to burn through each division in football and examine the most over-hyped, over-valued, over-owned piece of fantasy garbage to be found. We’ll look at former studs, presumed values, “up-and-comers” and I’ll tell you why each and every one of them is a firm fuck no for me and why they should be for you, too. Today I take a friendly stroll to the land of sloppy seconds. I sniff around the NFC East and land on a dude that was once great, and is already locked up as a Hall of Famer. This man is Adrian Peterson. I’ll tell you what, I use to love watching this fucking man run the football, and I am a Lions fan. So while it hurt my heart for years to watch him terrorize lions defender, I’ve always enjoyed watching him do it to the rest of the league’s defenders. I can only imagine how he humiliates his children behind closed doors. At this point in his career, my friends, I advise you to say FUCK NO, when it comes to drafting sir Adrian Peterson for the 2019 season. And here’s why, in case you haven’t guessed. Reason #1 Age At some point AP’s being as old as dirt is going to catch up to him and his saggy balls. Despite the fact that he probably double straps and double spandex that shit so his dick doesn’t flop out a la Chris Jones circa 2016 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ywQtksH4RQ. The man will be 34 years old for the 2019 NFL season. There is zero precedent showing that he will be able to sustain any type of success at this age. Mike Tagliere looked at 773 RBs over a 10 year period and found all of 3 guys to finish in the top 36 at the position at age 34. Check the article here if you don’t believe me. One might argue that you could have said the same thing during his 33 year old season, though and a new contract says the team sees something. But look, the clock never stops going tick fucking tock (even for ADAP). Reason # 2 Fading ability I’ll give AP some credit, he had some efficiency stats that were impressive last season like: 12 breakaway runs which was 10th in the NFL according to Playerprofiler.com, or 81 evaded tackles which ranked him 5th in the NFL. However, the bad outshines the good for me, here. Namely these two, which, last time I checked, counts for something in our game. He was only handed 6 goal line carries in 2018. From inside the 5 he had 7 carries, half of his teams tries from there. He has not been a main part of the passing game this year, either. He tallied only 20 receptions on 26 targets last season. Adrian Peterson will not improve upon any one singular base rushing or receiving statistic this season. With Guice on the way back, it’s tough to say he’ll maintain much work at all (see reason #3). If you pay for last season’s numbers, you are wasting your fucking draft picks or auction money.
Reason # 3 Opportunity (My biggest concern of all) It is official, AP is a Redskin again. Last year the Redskins used a 2nd round pick on Derrius Guice who suffered a season ending knee injury in the preseason. He seems to be on the road to recovery https://riggosrag.com/2019/01/15/redskins-guice-progress-2019/ and will likely supplant AP as the starting running back sooner than later. As DweezeNutz, The Big Whizz, and I have discussed many time on the pod, AP is nothing but a volume guy at this point in his career. Newsflash: THE VOLUME AIN’T GUNNA BE THERE THIS SEASON! Listen to me now and thank me later. Stay the fuck away in redrafts, auctions, and obviously Dynasties (though if I have to tell you that, I’ve got a startup league with a spot reserved for you). I love me AP from the past, but this AP I want no part of. The Bullfrog
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July 2019
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